Gluten-free on the go

In case you’ve been asleep for the past year, or you have a highly paid assistant named Hobbes who does your grocery shopping for you, you have probably noticed that “Gluten Free” is a big buzzword in food right now.

Gluten is a type of protein usually found in wheat, but it’s also in barley, spelt, rye and some oat products. Many people have a hard time tolerating wheat and gluten. Some folks have an allergy to it; others have a condition called Celiac disease, which can cause very serious health effects.

In my personal opinion (not supported by any scientific evidence whatsoever), I think the popularity of the gluten-free fad has been spreading because someone who is affected by the protein goes gluten free, experiences awesome results, and then blabs about it all over Facebook, prompting other people to try the diet change. In some cases, these other folks also experience awesome results, and they go blabbing, too.

In my case, omitting wheat and gluten from my diet led to a much happier digestive system. The chronic aches and pains in my hands and hip that I thought were the beginning of rheumatoid arthritis are now gone. My cycles went from totally whacked to pretty much normal for a 41-year-old woman. I sleep better. I lost a little weight (only about 10 lbs, but I was not overweight). My respiratory allergies are almost gone. My nails are stronger, my hair grows faster. I have a lot more energy, and I don’t get sick as often.

I am not trying to convert you to gluten-free living: some people are gluten sensitive, and others are not. If you do live gluten-free, however, I wanted so share some of my experience about traveling and eating with this restriction.

Airplanes.

Airplanes are probably the worst place for a gluen-free person to be trapped for an entire day. The top tip I can give you is to pack a cooler on the plane. You’ll be going through TSA screening, so take a small, soft-sided, lunch-sized cooler. If you use the gel freezer packs, TSA may confiscate them. You can pack a baggie of ice cubes in the cooler, and then throw it out in the security line. I normally pack my lunch bag the night before, put the whole thing in the fridge, and take it all out in the morning. It usually stays cool all day without ice or gel packs.

I usually pack my travel cooler with dried fruit, nuts, celery and carrot sticks, gluten-free pretzels, a fresh apple, orange, banana, and mini baby-bell cheeses. Sometimes I might throw in some beef jerky, but that stuff does tend to be a little stinky. You can even freeze and take the yogurt tubes marketed toward little-kid lunchboxes. I don’t buy the yogurt tubes very often because they are full of sugar and food dyes, but this is a special occasion.  For travel, I also pack the tiny cups of individually packed peanut butter like (Jif “To-Go”). These too are a little more sugar/corn-syrupy and hydrogenated than I would normally like, but we’re trying to get through a full day of unpredictable food supply here.

If you can find single-serving-sized hummus packs, those are nice, too. TSA won’t let you take a full-sized tub of hummus on the plane.

You know how hard it is to find any edible food on an airplane--it is too much to expect them to have gluten-free food. If you ask about gluten-free options (even in First Class) be prepared for the flight attendant to look at you like you are that creepy little monster John Lithgow saw sitting on the airplane wing in the old “Twilight Zone” movie.

Hotel snacks.

My husband and I always stow a stash of hotel snacks in our checked bags. We have really big bags, by the way. I like to take protein bars (I particularly like Kind bars and Nature Valley Protein bars—make sure you read the ingredient list) and more representatives of the gluten free snacks packed for the plane. I don’t pack fresh fruit or veggies in the checked bags, because they tend to rot pretty fast in transit and no one wants bananas getting all mashed up into their pajamas.

Whatever you do, do not pack Glutino’s fudge-coated gluten-free pretzels. Those things kick the butt of all other gluten-free foods, and I can almost guarantee you will binge-eat an entire five-serving bag in five minutes, especially if you have been surviving on dried apples and old cheese for three days.

Restaurants.

If you have tried to live more than a week seriously gluten-free, then you know what a pain and gluten derailer restaurant eating can be. At home, I try to minimize eating out as much as possible, but it does get boring eating camp food three meals a day for days on end while on the road.  Although it’s splendid if you are able to get a hotel with kitchenette or even a microwave, that doesn’t always work out. Even if it does, you are likely to eventually crave human company strongly enough that you will leave your hotel cave and search for nourishment and comraderie in a restaurant.

Many large chain restaurants have official gluten-free menus. I don’t always trust them, because when I was in high school, I went out with a couple of restaurant cooks, and this is who I imagine is making my food. I also visualize this person spilling flour all across the top of my gluten-free entrée. 

Some of the gluten-free menus are intensely boring. Apparently at the Olive Garden, for example, gluten-free seems to them to mean “totally bland and appropriate for people offended by flavor.”

So sometimes I have to make my own suggestions and improvements, and I always ask a lot of questions.

French fries are usually a no-go, because they are often coated in flour, and if not, they are almost always fried in a deep fryer with other wheaty things, which contaminates them.

In general, no bread (unless, like Legal Sea Foods, they actually have gluten-free rolls on request) no soups and no Cajun food (unless the meal is specifically prepared for gluten sensitivity, Cajun food normally starts with a roux—a mix of flour and butter). No gravy.  No creamy sauces. No chinese food unless, like PF Chang’s, the restaurant has a gluten-free menu and gluten-free soy sauce. No desserts, unless they happen to have a chocolate mousse or ice cream.

So, what can you eat at a restaurant? Salads are usually safe, but not only do I have to specify “no croutons,” I have to ask if there ever were croutons on the salad (yes, some servers would just pick the croutons off instead of making a whole new salad).  Chances are you are hungry, so you probably want some kind of protein on this salad—make sure it’s not breaded, deep-fried, or dredged. This may completely stymie an inexperienced chef—but they can still put salt, pepper and lemon juice on it and flame-broil it. And the salad dressings, too, can be a gluten hideaway. Ask, and if the server doesn’t know, just use a squeeze of lemon.

Many times, steaks are gluten-free. This is very exciting for me, because I don’t get to eat a lot of beef.  For a more casual meal when I feel like pretending I’m a junk-food eater, I get a hamburger with no bun and a side salad (no croutons, no dressing. Squeeze of lemon. Living on the edge).

I always ask, but barbeque is often gluten-friendly. Naked BBQ—I’m talking about the smoked meat alone, is a pretty safe bet, but you have to ask about any sauce that might be added.

You may now see why I lost 10 lbs since going gluten-free. I am just thankful I can still have wine and pure chocolate. Going gluten-free is certainly not for everyone. It is kind of a pain in the butt. However, the dietary change has so drastically improved my day-to-day life that keeping it up is well worth the trouble.